I am, without a doubt, one of the most accomplished procrastinators you could ever meet. I like to face the prospect of a hefty deadline or exam in the same way many people do- with blissful ignorance.
Let’s look at today, for example. I woke up around 9.30am, showered and breakfasted, before chatting for a while with mother. Before I knew it, it was 12pm. Deciding that I really ought to get something productive done, I filled my rucksack with textbooks, note cards and coloured pens galore, before heading off to the study room. One hour’s work later, alongside several fb/ wordpress checks, plus the reading of my horoscope on every magazine site possible, I had produced a couple of haphazard mind maps. Marvellous, I thought. Time for a break. So back upstairs I went. Now, it’s two hours later, and I have very successfully watched Doctor Who, done some laundry, listened to a bit Elaine Paige on Sunday, and watched some Youtube videos of how to get toned arms. Even I have to wonder- SERIOUSLY?!
I have two ridiculously- ginourmous exams this week and I’m more concerned with where the sodding Tardis is than the fact that I know near enough zilch about Lit Theory, let alone that I’ve learned around fifteen short stories for a three hour, closed text exam, worth 100% of the module. Once again- SERIOUSLY?!
I have come to the conclusion that any exam period is the educational equivalent of hunting season. Us fearful students cower and quiver under the pressure to succeed, whilst schools and universities loom overhead, ready to pick of the weaklings. Ok, so maybe that’s a little extreme, but at the same time, there’s truth in it. The couple of weeks surrounding my A Levels last year was quite possibly the most stressful, exhausting and exasperating of my life. I get that exams are important- I wouldn’t be where I am in London right now if I’d cocked it all up- but at the same time, do they really have to be so stressful?
Yes, yes, I know what you’re thinking: stop being such a lazy bugger, do some work and everything will be fine! You’re right, and I know this, but I never normally realise it until a couple of days beforehand. It’s only when something horrific is staring me right in the face that my flight over fight mentality is reversed and I finally get motivated, working solidly until I’m walking into that exam hall.
My next exam is on Wednesday, so it’s high time I left the Doctor to his travels and get on with fighting a couple of my own monsters. Post-structuralism, I hope you’re ready for this…
